We say we LOVE unconditionally, but do we really? We have many relationships, a lover, friends, family, work associates, etc. Many times we see people as objects for our own needs rather then wanting to connect with their divinity.

Some of us fall in LOVE with someone because we make up a story about who they are and how they’ll provide for us in some way and when they do something that doesn’t follow our rules we say, “They just weren’t the person I thought they were.”

Things that make me go hmmmm. Why do we choose who we allow into our lives? Many people don’t show all aspects of themselves. Why? They’re afraid of what others might say. Where does this fear come from? It comes from what we see on social media, “I’m deleting or going to bash people who……..” So hey, it’s not acceptable to show all aspects of ourselves eh?

Many people are really careful about who they allow into their lives, why? “I can’t handle anything that triggers me, so I’m going to protect myself so I don’t feel what I’ve wanted to suppress.”

What is this girl talking about? Well, if we haven’t made peace with the parts of us that we consider “negative” or those parts of us that we haven’t healed, then when we experience it in others, we run and say “They’re negative, I can’t be around them.” If we’ve made peace with those parts of us, then when we see those parts in others, we’ll have compassion for our sisters and brothers.

Let’s be clear here, I’m not saying to stay in a relationship with someone who’s abusing you, and if this is you, be careful about blaming yourself and saying “How did I create this?” People act out sometimes, especially if they’ve been trying to hide their pain, they need to lash out “at you” so they can release that hurt/anger onto someone else.

How do you choose your friends or lovers? Have you ever thought about this? Many times I see “I want to be around like minded people” Yes, I understand, I said that too, but what does that mean? That we want to be around people who only agree with us and follow our ways? Do we only want to be around people who are nice to us and don’t trigger us in any way?

I had a guy ask me out the other day, I told him that I was honored but I’m gay and that we can still be friends. He said “No, I can’t be friends with you, I like you in a different way.” What? Ok.

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I grew up believing people were meant to meet my needs and if they didn’t I would leave. I saw them as objects for what “they could do for me” instead of seeing them as a beautiful divine BEing who can share in this amazing journey with me.

I once was in a relationship with someone who bought me anything I wanted, I stayed with this person for a long time even though it was abusive, but hey, they bought me anything eh? Is that really LOVE?

As I’ve gotten “older” I see relationships differently, I connect with others for fun and for free, not what they “do” for me. I have a friend that every time we go out he wants to buy me things, I always tell him, “I just enjoy your company” He’s very persistent in giving to me and it often causes a friction between us. I’ve given into his generosity, but that’s not why I like to go out with him, oh how things have changed.

Only with self awareness will we see how we’re truly living. This isn’t about judgment, it’s about self awareness, noticing our actions and re-actions in a loving way and seeing if this is the way we want to experience our lives today.

Living in integrity in heart and mind, to me is the greatest treasure we’ll ever find. When we’re loving for fun and for free, we’re letting our energy flow more naturally. Human BEings think “What’s in it for me” Our souls let the LOVE flow freely.

By healing the wounds around our heart, we’ll BE given a fresh new start. LOVE will naturally flow and we’ll feel amazing from head to toe. This to me is what living in the loving means, it’s letting LOVE flow freely through us and out to everyone and everything.

Loving you beautiful souls