Have you ever had that “aha” moment where you felt “Fricken eh, the way that I’m living isn’t the real me?” Perhaps you’re caught in addictive behaviors, feeling depressed, treating yourself badly, not living up to your fullest potential etc. I’ve had the awareness quite a few times that I wasn’t living in alignment with my truth inside, I made some changes but then found myself going unconscious again, doing what I’ve always done, feeling the ways I’ve always felt, believing the ways I always did and attracting the same type of situations into my life with different people and scenarios.

I recently volunteered at an event where there were transgenders. To me this is such a great example of creating a “new person” or perhaps I should say, honoring the truth of how we feel inside. Most of us aren’t aware of our true selves because we’ve been wearing a mask for so long and we believe that the mask is who we are. We’re living in our conditioning or how we chose to be in order to “fit in” to be accepted and LOVED, and now we feel depressed or we’re acting out in addictions and we don’t know why. The why is because we’re not living in our truth. We don’t need medication, what we need is to connect with our LOVE inside and make peace with ourselves. Once we come to a place of peace, LOVE and acceptance, then we can notice the ideas, beliefs and patterns that don’t resonate with our true selves. The next step is a process of aligning with our truth and practicing it every day until it becomes our natural way.

Now you might be asking “Why is this a process?” That’s a great question. Once we get inspired about aligning with our true selves, how we now want to BE and what we want to experience/manifest, the ideas, concepts and beliefs that don’t resonate with this will be brought to the surface to be acknowledged, shifted, healed, integrated and LOVED. For many this can be quite challenging if we’re not aware of what’s going on or if we’re uncomfortable with feeling our feelings. Another reason why this might be challenging is that we’ve become accustomed to living a certain way and we’re attached to an identity of who we “think” we are. Because of this we hold on tight, even if it isn’t serving our highest good, all it’s really serving is our idea of “safety.” If this is you, you might want to ponder this question; “Are you really safe if you’re not living in integrity with how YOU truly feel inside or if you’re hiding behind addictions and fear?”

Resistance (which is mostly unconscious) often arises when we decide to make a change, even when we want to create the “good” things in life. Why is this? There can be many reasons why, I will share a few that I’ve personally experienced as well as those of the clients whom I assist. First, why do I say “mostly unconscious” to the idea of having resistance? Well, we might say that we want something or to feel a different way or to break a habit or addiction and at the same time we’re also holding onto what’s familiar with reasons that are unknown to our conscious mind. The reasons are from past experiences, ideas, concepts, secondary gain or beliefs that are stored in our subconscious, which carries more power then our conscious minds. It also might be that the fear of change is more powerful then staying the same. In order for things to flow more easily and naturally, it’s important to get the conscious and subconscious in alignment with the truth at our core and LOVE every part of ourselves even more then before.

Now back to why change and having what we want might be challenging. Most of us are frightened of the unknown and what we project “out there” from previous experiences, core wounds or from situations we’ve seen or heard about. We may also have beliefs about how we “should” be passed down from our family line. For instance, there’s something called the tipping point, have you heard of it? Well, say you have a certain set point for success, and your belief system only allows you to go to a certain point and once you get to that certain point you seem to stop or things start to become extra challenging.

We often make unconscious (sometimes conscious) vows to our families to keep the energy of the family line going. These vows may include depression, poverty, struggle, addictions. limitations, etc. Once we become aware of these vows and how they’re playing out in our lives, it’s then that we can shift it to match our truth inside. Another idea that might be stopping us from making a change is because we’re focusing on what we’ll lose instead of what we’ll gain. So, in essence, if what we say we want to experience isn’t happening, then it might be because it’s from our ego’s desires and not from our soul, or there’s some kind of inner conflict going on inside of us, or something better is on its way but we’re not able to see it yet because our “conditioning” is in the way, or we’re being taught that our happiness comes from within ourselves, not from what we have or do.

Now, you might be thinking “I understand this, but why would I resist being wealthy, creating a loving relationship with a significant other, honoring how I feel inside or having my dream job if I know this is a representation of who I truly am?” Well, think about it, if you move into a “new” way of living/BEing, your life IS going to change, your identity IS going to change, the people in your life might leave and this might be frightening to the part of you that believes it’s only safe if it keeps living the way it’s living. Whenever we start to make changes it feels a little disorienting at the beginning as things start to shift, and instead of staying with the flow, most of us go back to what we know, even if we say that we don’t like it.

There’s always a positive reason why we do what we do. The positive reason might not look positive to our conscious mind, however, I invite you to move into the deeper part of you and see how BEing the way you are is serving you in one way or another, otherwise you wouldn’t be living the way you do. Get it? Once you find out how it’s served you in the past or is serving you today and you LOVE that part of you, most often your energy naturally shifts, otherwise it’s like “trying” to move forward with the brakes on and that’s Fricken draining wouldn’t ya say?

Most people just want to “think positive” and I get it, it does feel better, however, when we’re creating something new, it’s like planting a garden. First we need to embrace and acknowledge who we are and where we are today. (Looking at your life/garden with LOVE and compassion). Once we’ve made peace with ourselves and our lives, then we can look at our conditioning by taking some quiet time with ourselves and question everything, YES, question everything about how we’re thinking, feeling and believing in relation to WHO we are and how we’re living (Go into the dirt). After each awareness ask yourself “Does this FEEL like the real me?” (How does your garden feel) Next we can dig up the roots, (beliefs that no longer serve us) till the soil (shift the beliefs) plant new seeds (create a vision) water it daily (affirmations and visioning) tend to the soil (nurture your vision and yourself with LOVE) have expectancy with excitement (Imagine it, feel it, taste it, smell it, hear it, know it, BE it) TRUST in divine timing (Take INSPIRED action, fallow your joy and let go). Enjoy your life as you tend to your garden and continue to pull out the weeds (Do these steps daily and notice what arises that’s asking for your attention, the beliefs and ideas that are now ready to be acknowledged, shifted and LOVED) and once it’s in bloom, you have a beautiful garden. (Conscious and subconscious alignment with the truth at your core.)

Now you might be asking “How do we know the difference between our true selves and our conditioning?” That’s a great question; by noticing how we’re feeling. Our feelings are one of our most reliable sources, they reveal to us the meanings we’re giving about ourselves and our situations. If we’re triggered by anger, resentment, blame, lack, fear, judgment, impatience, needing to have things a certain way or seeing ourselves in a negative way, etc. most often it’s coming from our conditioning or a core wound/belief that’s asking to be acknowledged, healed, integrated and LOVED. When you notice this you might want to bring LOVE, compassion, understanding and forgiveness (if necessary) to the parts that are hurting inside.

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When there’s something that you want to have, be or do, notice the intentions and the why’s behind them. If you feel you “need” to have something or for someone to act in a certain way in order for you to be okay. If you feel you “need” to fit in, to be liked, to feel good enough by trying to prove yourself or get recognition for what you do etc. these are your clues to the energy that’s driving your behaviors that are most likely stemming from your conditioning and a part of you that’s asking to BE LOVED by you.

Some of us try to compensate for not feeling good enough by trying to do more, have more, be more or prove to others that we’re “someone important” not realizing that our inherent LOVE, VALUE and GOODNESS is already within us. We’re already LOVED and approved of by the highest authority, we’re the universe’s priority. WE ARE LOVE.

Now, am I saying that having more, BEing more and doing more isn’t good, heck no, it’s part of the journey of expansion and getting to know more of who we are and our infinite potential. This often happens naturally when we’re living in alignment with our hearts and souls and IF it’s in alignment with our souls purpose.

So, how do we know if we’re living in alignment with our true Selves? We’re feeling trust, freedom, oneness, peace, openness, and LOVE and we’re flowing easily with our natural creativity, JOY and rhythm. We’re not attached to outcomes, what we have or do, what others think of us or how we think things “should” be, instead we’re following our joy, our intuitive guidance and inspiration, we’re enjoying the moment and letting things flow more naturally. Do we still have challenges, yep, however, we embrace them and see them as growth opportunities and another layer (part of us) that’s asking to be acknowledged, healed, integrated and LOVED.

In essence what we’re really seeking isn’t outside, it’s our alignment with our truth inside, the qualities of peace, LOVE, joy, happiness etc. I see many people posting pictures of money on facebook, I get it, it’s a symbol of how they want to feel by having lots of money and experience their inherent value and worth, which was given to us at our birth. So, if you’re someone who wants a lot of money, I invite you to consider the idea of FEELING into the state of BEing, the ESSENCE of a billionaire rather then focusing on “money.” Here’s a good example that came through me as a message from my inner BEing after I cleared my fears about being wealthy and successful. “Wealth is When you’re Experiencing A way of Life that says that you can BE, do and have anything and you’re giving and receiving in a way that flows from your natural state of BEing.” This is a FEELING inside that says “I am ABUNDANCE, I know I’m supported and LOVED, I LOVE and value myself and my life experience, I KNOW that I CAN BE, do, have, give and receive anything I want, I’m fricken worth it.” WOW, now that’s such a great FEELING wouldn’t ya agree?

Most of us have layers of conditioning that’s covering up who we truly are, some of it’s conscious and some of it’s unconscious. This is why I say; “Doing the inner work is the key if you really want to BE happy and free.” I understand that it does feel better to FEEL good then to feel bad, yep, I get it, however, the more we deny the “bad” feelings we’re blocking our flow, prolonging our healing and the freedom of living from our hearts and souls. Once we drop the labels of “good or bad” to our feelings and our situations and embrace them as experiences we’re having and messengers assisting us on our journey, it’s then that we can learn what we need to learn and it’s an opportunity for us to discern. Discern what’s right for us today and how we want to experience this earthly play. When we’re in acceptance of everyone and everything, we feel more relaxed and when we feel more relaxed we can listen to our inner BEing.

Remember to BE gentle and loving with yourself as you move along your journey. Self awareness is NOT to beat yourself up, it’s to LOVE every part of yourself and every part of your journey with the acknowledgment that you came here to learn, grow and expand beyond what you know. You came here enjoy the journey and embrace all of your experiences, knowing that they’re perfect for YOU and your souls growth and evolution. You’ve been living a certain way for a reason and now you’re ready for a new season. There’s something or perhaps I should say many things that you came here to experience and do, stay true to your heart and what it’s showing you. Your desires are your soul showing you the way, listen to your soul and what it has to say. They’re showing you the state of BEing that’s right for your journey here, it’s helping you choose LOVE instead of fear. Self awareness is the key, if you really want to set yourself free.

Here’s something for you to ponder, go ahead and let your mind wander;
“How would you feel and what would you do if you were so in LOVE with you?”

You can do this, I believe in you and I LOVE YOU