Experiencing depression can feel like we’re living in a fog, we’ve lost hope, there’s an empty feeling inside and we just want to run and hide.

Sometimes we find a way to numb our pain or fill our emptiness with food, drugs or alcohol. By doing so we feel good at the beginning, until we start to feel that feeling again that something’s missing and that we don’t really enjoy anything.

We’re watching everyone else have fun and enjoy their lives and all we feel is pain, struggle and strife and sometimes we want to end our life. The darkness takes over and all we see is hopelessness, despair and misery.

If we’ve felt this way for awhile, it’s become our earthly bio. It’s become an automatic response to how we’re living our lives, based on how we feel inside and sometimes we don’t even know why.

It feels lonely because no one can really understand what we’re experiencing and we feel like we’re the only one who’s feeling this way, we feel “different” and isolated from others in this earthly play.

The littlest things seem so challenging to do and we think we’re “bad” for not being able to do what “normal” people do.

Each day we wake up and say, “I hope things will change, I want to experience a fulfilling life journey.” But, as we start our day, those icky thoughts come out to play. “I’m not good enough, so why even try, I hate myself and I hate life. No one cares or understands what I’m going through, I don’t belong and I don’t know what to do.”

We’ve lost hope, clarity and the ability to trust ourselves, life, god and others. Sometimes our health has declined and we don’t feel like we have a purpose or meaning in life, we’re just existing, we’re really not living.

Sometimes our circumstances aren’t the way we want them to be and this can make us feel like we’re bad or wrong for these experiences happening; which can create depressing feelings.

We LOVE and embrace the parts of ourselves that we feel will be accepted by the human race, and we deny and push aside the parts we don’t like, in fear that others will see, that we’re not perfect human beings. This splits us in two and leaves us fragmented and confused.

If we start to feel better, it doesn’t feel right, our bodies and minds have become so familiar with feeling depressed, that as soon as we start to be happy, they call us back and say “Hey, we need you to feel crappy.” This is why it can be a bit challenging to create a new way of BEing, our bodies have become adjusted to how we’re feeling and living, our energy is stuck and we fear changing.

We feel powerless and confused, we don’t even try because “what’s the use.” We’ve narrowed our perceptions and points of views of who we are and what we can have, experience and do. We think we “should” be able to break the cycle, but it just seems impossible.

When we’re out, some of us put a smile on our face and we try to look successful and great. But deep inside, there’s so much pain, going on in the inner plane. We feel it when we’re still and alone and we get anxious because it’s not okay to be feeling this way.

We feel unworthy and that it’s not okay for us to enjoy our life journey. This idea is being created from unresolved issues, trauma, hurt and pain that’s going on in our inner plane. Most of us aren’t aware of this consciously, it’s happening deep below and blocking our natural glow.

Society tells us to look for some end goal in the outer world, rather than attaining a sense of completeness within. We’ve been taught that some achievement, attainment, or physical manifestation will make us happy and we’ll “Be somebody.” These “things” may bring a sense of happiness and fulfillment at the beginning, but that fulfillment is short lived IF we’re not living from/knowing our truth and feeling a connection to the divine.

For some of us being depressed has become our identity, and letting go can seem like a betrayal to our personality.

We think it’s not okay to express how we feel or say what we want to say when we’re depressed or even when we’re feeling okay, so instead we “betray” ourselves and we say what we think other people want to hear and we follow other people’s ways, to be LOVED and accepted in this earthly play.

What makes someone think, feel and act this way? What’s happening inside this beautiful being? What’s creating the depression and misery?

Depression is a cry out from our soul, asking us to see that something isn’t right internally that wants to be acknowledged, understood and LOVED. It’s a way that our soul’s trying to get our attention, to help us heal, resolve and bring LOVE to the inner affliction. It’s showing us that our energy is stuck inside and that we’ve stopped the flow of life.

We feel a loss that’s so profound and deep, because we’ve disconnected from our divinity. Darkness, depression, anger, sadness, hurt and pain is covering our light and we’re experiencing an internal fight.
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It can seem like a never ending cycle that feels impossible to break and sometimes we just accept it as our fate. But that’s not true, you CAN change if you choose to. It’s a process and not easy at times, but if you stick with it, happiness, peace, LOVE, joy and your connection to the divine you’ll find.

How do I know, I’ve gone through the process myself. I get it, I’ve been there, I lived in depression, addictions, anxiety, darkness and fear for over 30 years, I hid in my house and cried many tears. It was challenging and lonely, I acted out in many ways, I tried to numb the hurt and pain and fill the emptiness with substances and worldly things. I used/abused food and exercise and I also starved myself and destroyed my health. I took pills to sleep the day away, I cut my wrists and my face and I tried to take my life many times. I chased after people, money and things, but this never brought me true peace, LOVE or happiness.
What was happening for me then, might be happening for you and shall you choose, I can assist you in experiencing something new.

You can BE FREE from depression, addictions, fear and anxiety and experience a happy and fulfilling life journey. It takes a commitment and willingness to change, do the inner healing, bring LOVE to the parts that are hurting and create a new self image that’s more empowering.

I see depression, addictions, illness, anxiety etc. as a spiritual crisis, a wake up call. On the level of our soul a question is being asked and a question is being answered all of the time. “What’s this life about? What its value? Who am I BEcoming and what am I doing here?” 

There’s great wisdom that can be gained from going through challenges and suffering that we would not freely choose. As with all experiences that are painful and that create limitation/resistance, there’s a great lesson our soul is growing through. The choices that our soul makes during these times will determine what will happen next on our journey.

“What has limitation on one side, offers the possibility for learning and for greater life on the other.”

It’s possible, as a result of feeling disconnected from joy or meaning in life, to begin to seek joy with a fuller heart and to value and appreciate ourselves and life more. It’s possible that in the presence of aloneness or isolation to feel our heart longing for more love, a deeper connection with ourselves, the divine and our fellow beings. it’s possible to feel, in the presence of the wish to die, an even greater wish to live. It’s possible, as a result of feeling useless, confused and hopeless to seek and find our purpose and meaning.

These are the choices our soul makes to awaken us to a greater truth, they turn our inner self in the direction of pursuing the fulfillment that we truly desire and towards new possibilities for happiness, growth, purpose and a more exciting and meaningful life experience. 

Though depression may be a ‘dark night of the soul’ which we would not consciously choose and in which it may appear that every light has gone out, our soul continues the seeking of that light and continues to radiate light and LOVE towards the parts of ourselves that suffers and struggles. 

Depression isn’t always visible on the outer level where wealth, family, relationships, and success may all be in place and operating as symbols of a successful life. On an inner level, the being can feel like something’s missing, there’s an inner void, an emptiness inside that can only be filled with LOVE, light, truth and our connection to the divine. 

Healing.brings to the surface the energy blockages and unresolved issues that were previously dormant within our consciousness so they may be directly addressed and healed. Once our energy starts moving inside, our lives do to and peace, LOVE, joy and happiness naturally flows through.

The key to healing depression, anxiety, addictions, etc. is to LOVE ourselves unconditionally and work on all levels of our being, physical, mental, emotional and spiritual – body, mind, heart and spirit/soul.

At the root of depression is often a feeling of separation, lack, or void and a sense of helplessness in relation to filling this void.

The emptiness is felt by our deeper self that is hungry for LOVE, light and truth – who’s hungry for happiness, meaning and purpose, who’s hungry for a source of light to banish the darkness within the self and within the world.

Everywhere in life, things are moving, relationships are changing, disappointments are happening, letting go is required. In the midst of this, there is the Eternal presence saying, “I am with you, I am you.” 
 


There is no one way to go about this, there are many paths to truth and one needs to follow their own preference. No matter what feelings are present on the emotional level, there is a level beneath these feelings that always remains present. To seek it with a whole heart is to pursue wisdom. To find it is to experience truth and LOVE.