How do you know if it’s a “good” or “bad” thing; can you really see the bigger picture? What are you basing good or bad on? Are you saying that if things go “your” way then they’re good and if they don’t then they’re bad? What would happen if you dropped the labels and just said “this is an experience I’m having.” How do you think your feelings about yourself and the experience will change? Most often when we call an experience “bad” we start to put up walls of resistance and we can’t see the amazing gift in the “opportunity.”

If everything, yes, EVERYTHING we go through is serving us and is part of our souls growth and evolution, well, everything we experience is a valuable gift. Many times we don’t see the gift when we’re in a “challenging” situation because, like I said before, we often put up walls of resistance and we’re not able to see through the fog of fear.

For instance; say you got fired from your job and you immediately got fearful because you didn’t know how you were going to pay your bills. Your survival mechanisms kicked in and you started to panic. After you calmed down, you realized that this was really a blessing in disguise. It’s given you an opportunity to find a way of being of service and support yourself that really excites you, that you’re passionate about and is more in alignment with who you truly are. You were frightened to quit, so the universe did for you what you couldn’t do for yourself. Fast forward a few months ahead, now you’re working at a job that you LOVE, you’re sharing your natural talents and gifts, you’ve shifted outdated belief patterns that weren’t serving you and now you’re making twice as much money. Bam; the bigger picture is now revealed.

Any time we make a change in our lives, at the beginning it might be a little scary, it’s normal, at least that’s how I see it. If we just allow ourselves to be afraid instead of resisting it, most often that fear will dissipate and we’ll be able to see and feel something bigger that’s trying to emerge through us and open a new door of opportunity that’s even better. Or, perhaps there’s a great learning in the experience that’s preparing us for something that’s coming up in our lives and without that learning we won’t have the understanding on how to handle it. Again I say “good” or “bad” who knows?

Here’s another example; say you met the man or woman of your dreams or so you thought; ya, I’ve been there too. At the beginning it’s all gumdrops and roses, you and your partner are on your best behavior, you’re so in LOVE. After you get comfortable with each other, well, ya know, here comes to the surface those parts of ourselves that we didn’t want to show and perhaps for them too. I’ve said this one and many of my clients and friends have too, here ya go, are ya ready? “They’re just not the person I thought they were.” Aha, well, actually they were and weren’t, but were you? If you’re both wearing a mask or trying to hide parts of yourselves that you haven’t made peace with, how could you have a deep soul connection? This is why I say in many of my posts, “Do the inner work.” Once you make peace with and LOVE and embrace all parts of you, especially the parts that you’ve pushed aside and don’t like, you’ll no longer have to hide or be on guard. You’re now free to be yourself and guess what you’ll most likely attract, yep, someone who is free to be themselves too. Divine transparency = Divine relationship = True soul LOVE.

Another idea that I want to add is that we often create stories about how someone is, meaning; we see what we want to see and we make up a story about what that means for us. Say for instance you found a LOVER who’s really loving and caring towards you, perfect lover right? You finally feel LOVED and cared for and now you “expect” them to be this way all the time and when they’re not being there in the ways you think they “should” well, I think you know what the answer is eh?

This is where unconditional LOVE comes in. I know, many of us say that we LOVE unconditionally, however, do we really? Loving unconditionally means accepting everyone and everything UNCONDITIONALLY. It’s not necessarily accepting or condoning someone’s behavior, it’s loving the BEing doing the behavior, get it? If someone is abusive or mean to you, by all means walk away. We all go through various moods and feelings throughout they day, should that block the flow of LOVE to ourselves or others? Just something to ponder.
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It’s only when we have expectations of how things and people “should” be that we get disappointed. It’s okay to be disappointed, I get disappointed because I had a “preference” and it didn’t happen the way I preferred. The difference today in comparison to how I used to deal with disappointment is that I don’t close my heart, where in the past, yep, my walls would go up and you weren’t allowed in my life anymore because “you” didn’t meet “my” expectations, get it?

We all get hurt, disappointed, angry, sad, etc. but it only hurts us if we close our hearts. No matter how you feel, IT’S OKAY, do your best to be gentle and loving with yourself. If someone activates something in you, then that’s just a part of you that’s asking to be healed, thank them, yes, they are helping you heal. It’s important to look inside to notice the source of the issue, it’s rarely about the other person, it’s mostly about a core wound or belief that’s asking to be LOVED, shifted, healed and integrated.

Whenever I notice my heart closing I pray “Please dear God, help me to keep my heart open.” Feel free to do the same.

May you find a way to LOVE and accept yourself, everyone and every experience you have with a knowing that everything is serving you in one way or another. See what you can learn and give yourself the option to discern. Discern to make choices to live in a loving way with yourself and others throughout the day.

You can do this, I believe in you and I LOVE YOU